Took the words right out of my mouth!

Losing- By Tenth Avenue North

I can't believe what she said

I can't believe what he did
Oh, don't they know it's wrong?
Don't they know it's wrong?

Well maybe there's something I missed
But how could they treat me like this?
It's wearing out my heart
The way they disregard

This is love. This is hate.
We all have a choice to make

Oh, Father won't You forgive them?
They don't know what they've been doin' (oh no)
Oh, Father, give me grace to forgive them
Cause I feel like the one losin'

It's only the dead that can live
But still I wrestle with this
To lose the pain that's mine
Seventy times seven times

Lord it doesn't feel right
For me to turn a blind eye
But I guess it's not that much
When I think of what You've done.

This is love. This is hate.
We've got a choice to make

Oh, Father, won't You forgive them?
They don't know what they've been doin'
Oh, Father, give me grace to forgive them
Cause I feel like the one losin' (oh no)

Why do we think that hate's gonna change their heart?
We're up in arms over wars that don't need to be fought
But pride won't let us lay our weapons on the ground
We build our bridges up, but just to burn them down
We think pain is owed apologies and then it'll stop
But truth be told it doesn't matter if they're sorry or not
Freedom comes when we surrender to the sound
Of Mercy and Your Grace, Father, send Your angels down (singin')

Oh, Father, won't you forgive them?
They don't know what they've been doing (oh, no)
Oh, Father, give me grace to forgive them
Cause I feel like the one losing
I feel like I've been losing

Oh Father won't you forgive them
They don't know what they've been doin'
Oh Father, give me grace to forgive them
Cause I feel like the one losin'
I feel like I've been losing

Oh, Father, give me grace to forgive them
Cause I feel like the one losin'

I don't know that there could have been a more perfect song to describe the battle that has been raging inside during this whole ordeal. I know this next week will be hard for me but I am going to do my best to focus on the Lord and His blessings and know without a doubt that He has a plan and that this is all for my good. "You make all things work together for our good" I will find comfort in Jeremiah 29 ¹¹ For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future" and Mathew 18 21 Then Peter came to Jesus and asked, “Lord, how many times shall I forgive my brother or sister who sins against me? Up to seven times?” 22 Jesus answered, “I tell you, not seven times, but seventy-seven times". 

It happens so often that I need to be reminded that my sins are just as bad as the next. That doesn't mean that actions and sins made by other don't hurt and won't continue to hurt, for who knows how long. The lyrics "Father won't you forgive them, they don't know what they've been doing. Oh Father, give me grace to forgive them, cuz I feel like the one losing" Wow so powerful and the words that I have never been able to say outloud because I couldn't figure out exactly what I was feeling. I do feel like the one losing, and that hurts so much. There is so much more to say, but for now I will leave it at this. Thank you Lord for giving me grace and for loving me, and for making all things work together for my good.